Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Psychiatry - YOU need it!

What the hell is wrong with people? I think most of the people I talk to every day you should get some form of psychiatric evaluation.

My day started out okay but then I had a very difficult client.

This person used to be in the health industry. That makes shit difficult. Then, looking at the history, I could tell this was not going to be a happy day.

Multiple complaints about multiple things. Ruled out almost every fucking disease known to man. And then this person comes to me saying no one is listening to her. When I bring up the fact that a psych eval might help, she flips out saying she's not crazy or depressed. She doesn't understand why everyone is saying this.

I'll tell you why.

It's because you are nuts. Do you really want help? You should go see a psychiatrist or a psychologist. You don't want to? Okay, then you're going to be miserable for the rest of your life. Suck it.

And that brings me to another point. What is the deal with this hatred for psychiatrists? They are here on this earth for a reason. They are here to protect me from all of you crazy fucks.

This is how I determine whether you need to see a psychiatrist:

1) Do you hate psychiatrists with a passion?

If the answer is yes, you DEFINITELY need to see a psychiatrist because you are a certifiable nutjob. Seriously, you are a mirror image of Tom Cruise and you need to get your crazy ass to a clinic ASAP.

2) Do you have a shit load of medical problems but doctors are telling you there is nothing wrong with you?

If the answer is yes, you need to get your sorry ass to a psychiatrist. Everyone thinks you're fucking crazy. So give us a break from your batshit craziness and see a therapist.

3) Are you a guy who thinks psychiatrists are for wimps?

If the answer is yes, you are such a fucking pussy that random people should kick the shit out of you every day. Go see a therapist and get your sorry ass on some mind altering drugs so I don't have to deal with you.

4) Are you a parent that thinks kids in America are on too many mind altering drugs?

If the answer is yes, you need to be locked up. First, I think these parents should be on mind altering drugs because they are fucking stupid and I don't want to hear from them. The way I see it, the reason we don't have an even shittier society is because these kids are on drugs. So suck on that assholes. Next, the kids are fucked up because the parents are fucked up or are a bunch of morons. Either way, that entire family needs some intervention fast.

Fucking fuckers.

Do you think I had a shitty day? Well, do you?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Whoa. This is rantier than usual. Someone needs an Awesome Blossom Stat!

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