The Finger

A strange event unfolded in front of me on my way to work. I was waiting at the corner to cross the street when suddenly a cab screeched to a halt right in front of me. From this cab emerged a diminutive middle aged Jewish woman with a scowl on her face. As she was furiously stepping out of her cab, an extremely large city bus pulled up right behind the car. This lady then proceeded to walk over to the front of this city bus and started yelling at the top of her lungs.

She yelled, "Fuck you, you fucking prick! You stupid ass fucker! You want to fuck with me! Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you!"

She then flipped the bus driver the bird.

Then she yelled, "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck you!!!!!"

She then flipped off the bus driver a second time and then started pounding the front grill of the bus. The lady also threw in a kick to the bumper.

I was watching this unfold and was very amused at this scenario. Here was this tiny lady taking on a multi-ton two cab city bus and she was not afraid of getting run over. I was also curious as to why this lady was so pissed off. I would think that if there were some driving issues, the cab driver and not the passenger would be going at it with the bus driver. Why was she so angry that she felt it necessary to pull a Tiananmen Square on this bus? As I was contemplating the answers to these questions, the lady decided to make my morning even more interesting by moving to the side of the bus.

When she moved to the side of the bus, she started to pound on the bus door. Then began an interesting routine. She would first yell, "Fuck you fucker!!!" and then pound on the door some more and then give the bus one swift kick. Then she would repeat. This went on and on for what seemed like 10 minutes until she finally decided to leave the scene after make a scene. As she was walking away, she gave the bus driver one more middle finger and disappeared into the crowd.

I really wanted to see the bus driver's reaction but the bus door was tinted just enough with city grime and dirt that I couldn't get a clear view. Nevertheless, I sure hope the bus driver found this as amusing as I did.

Public Transportation: Part 1 - A Bummer of an Experience

Tonight, I decided to take the bus home. I felt that I should do my part in helping the environment. Also, I wanted to save a little money and avoid paying the cab fare.

In retrospect, I should have taken the fucking cab.


It was 9pm and it was freezing cold. As I got out of the train station, I thought, maybe I should save this experiment for another time. However, I really wanted to know how to get home using the bus rather than paying the ridiculous cab fees so I figured, what the hell.

First, it was a pain in the ass figuring out what bus I was supposed to take. The bus station had 12 stops to choose from, all going to different destinations. The problem, of course, was that they all eventually went by the neighborhood that I was trying to go to. But depending on the bus, I could be home in 20 minutes or 2.5 hours.

After asking 7 people, I eventually found the bus stop. I had to ask 7 different people because each person sent me to the wrong place. When I went to one bus stop, the person told me I was in the wrong line and that I should go to another one. When I got there, they told me to go elsewhere, and so on and so on.

When I got to the appropriate stop, I looked at the bus schedule and found that the bus was on a 1 hour schedule; that is, the bus comes to the stop in one hour intervals. The reason for this was because after 9pm, there were very few buses operating the route.

I looked at the watch and it was 9:15. The next bus would arrive at 9:30. I thought to myself, "that's not too bad, I think I'll be a good Christian and wait this out without cursing out everyone". I texted my friend and told him of my little experiment and waited.

At 9:16, the wind started to pick up. It was freezing. The temperature dropped to 26 degrees (acoording to weather.com) and with wind chill, it was 16. Still, I figured I would wait it out.

9:30 had come and gone and now it was 9:40. There were no buses. I started to get pissed off and I was contemplating the cab option again. Just then, 3 buses simultaneously came into the bus terminal.

The bus I had to take was the 40. The three buses that came into the terminal were 60, 20, and "Main St. via Camberden". I didn't know what the fuck the third bus was but all three pulled up to my bus stop. I was very confused. None of the buses had the magic number 40 written on it. All three buses stopped and all three buses opened the doors. I decided I would ask the bus driver on the number 20 bus what the fuck was going on. I waited until the passengers boarded and I asked the driver, "is this the bus going to my destination?"

The bus driver smiled and said, "No, the bus you want is the one in front of me...leaving the station."

I thought, WHAT THE FUCK?!? I told him, "But that was the number 60. I thought I was supposed to look for the 40."

He replied, "That was the 40. He changed the sign right now."

Sure enough, when I looked up, the bus had changed the sign while I was walking up to the driver to ask my question. My number 40 drove away into the night.

I was really bummed and freezing. So, I hailed a cab and went home.


To be continued with concluding thoughts (Public Transportation: Part 2 - Smelly Conclusion)